An older lady gets pulled over for speeding...
>
>Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
>
>
>Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.
>
>
>Older Woman: Oh, I see.
>
>
>Officer: Can I see your license please?
>
>
>Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
>
>
>Officer: Don't have one?
>
>
>Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.
>
>
>Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.
>
>
>Older Woman: I can't do that.
>
>
>Officer: Why not?
>
>
>Older Woman: I stole this car.
>
>
>Officer: Stole it?
>
>
>Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.
>
>
>Officer: You what?
>
>
>Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to
>see
>
>
>The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls
>for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer
>slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.
>
>
>Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman
>steps out of her vehicle.
>
>
>Older woman: Is there a problem sir?
>
>
>Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and
>murdered the owner.
>
>
>Older Woman: Murdered the owner?
>
>
>Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.
>
>
>The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.
>
>
>Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?
>
>
>Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is quite
>stunned.
>
>
>Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving
>license.
>
>
>The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it
>to the officer.
>
>
>The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.
>
>
>Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a
>license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the
>owner.
>
>< B>
>
>Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.
>
>
>
>Don't Mess With Old Ladies
>
>If you want to brighten someone's day, pass this on to someone you know.
>
>
>
>I just did!